21 things I appreciate about you
A husband and wife recently celebrated 21 years of marriage. Still deeply in love, the wife has been battling episodes of depression and it hasn’t been easy. For several months now, she hasn’t felt like her old self. Desperately searching for ways to feel clear, happy and healthy again; she’s tried all of the standard medical remedies.
To celebrate their anniversary, the couple met for drinks at their favorite restaurant. The conversation and the date started poorly. Saddened and slightly frustrated at what seemed to be a missed opportunity for a joyful anniversary celebration, the man was at a loss for how to save the evening and reconnect with the woman he loves. Then, in a flash of inspiration, the husband said, “Honey, I love you so much and I am so grateful and lucky to be your partner. I am going to share with you 21 things I appreciate about you to represent the 21 years we’ve been married.”
As he stated each appreciation, he reflected on all of the joys and trials, the funny and the mundane life experiences that two people collect over 21 years. “I appreciate what a wonderful friend you are to me and how you always help me see the big picture. I appreciate that even back when we were dating you made me feel like I can accomplish anything, and you still do. I appreciate how you’ve cooked such nurturing meals for the family over the years. I appreciate what a fantastic lover you are.”
By the fifth item, the husband began to weep in awe and appreciation for this beautiful, magnificent woman in his life. She at first felt shy and slightly embarrassed. She laughed and tried to sweep away the love and praise, but as he continued something deep and profound surfaced and cut through the fog. Crying and laughing together, they caused quite a scene in the restaurant. It didn’t matter one bit. The more the husband shared, the more he cried tears of joy. The more she took in, the more she felt filled up.
By the twenty-first sincere appreciation, there was a palpable feeling of love and care filling the entire restaurant. Overflowing with a feeling of buoyancy, support and love, she felt like she hadn’t felt in a long, long time. The husband in turn felt open, caring, and protective.
After I heard this story I felt inspired to share twenty-one things that I appreciate about my own love. To my surprise, as I shared my 21 things she began to cry tears of joy. Man, it feels great to make the one you care for feel loved and appreciated. If you want to make the ones you care about overflow with feelings of love and support, look into their eyes and say, “I love you. I want to share 21 things that I deeply appreciate about you…” Try it today.
Thank you for such a beautiful story. I wonder what would happen to the divorce rate if couple's did that at least once a year for each other? I am fortunate to have a husband whom never waste's any time to tell me how he appreciates and thinks he's a better man since he met me (even though I disagree) come to think about it I should probably get my 21 together. To heck with feeling you can be all by yourself, we all need each other especially the ones who stand beside you through it all.
posted by charlotte on 10/29/2009 8:58 pm