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The hidden spirituality of men

The spiritual lives of men are, for many, concealed, repressed or forgotten. In an exclusive extract from his new book, Matthew Fox argues that men can rediscover their true selves by embracing the role of noble warrior.

If the warrior is different from the soldier, there must be distinct ways by which the warrior develops his or her strength. If the warrior is the mystic in action, then let’s try the following four steps on for size. They derive from the mystical/prophetic or mystical/warrior journey in the creation spirituality tradition.

1. The Via Positiva. This is the way of celebrating life, of seeing the world with its beauty and goodness, its grace and generosity—and being open to seeing more. This is the way of reverence, respect and gratitude. It’s the way of original blessing, whereby we live out the truth that the universe and life itself, for all the struggle and pain they dispense, have birthed us as individuals and communities with what we need for happiness and for sharing joy.
   
   
2. The Via Negativa. The Via Negativa goes into the darkness, the wounds, the pain and silence and solitude of existence to find what we have to learn there. It’s a way of letting go and letting be, of emptying and being emptied, of moving beyond judgment and beyond control, and learning to breathe, to sit, to be still, to dwell in silence, to taste nothingness without flinching and, ultimately, to focus. It’s the way of grieving. Without grief we can’t move on to the next stage, one of giving birth. The ancient German theologian, Meister Eckhart von Hochheim, calls the process of letting go “eternal.” The warrior faces death and, because he or she has, loves life more passionately.
   
   
3. The Via Creativa. Having fallen in love with life often (Via Positiva) and having been emptied and learned to let go and let be numerous times (Via Negativa), the spiritual warrior is ready to give birth. Creativity is the weapon, the sword, of the spiritual warrior—who is mother as well as father, and who digs deep into a wellspring of wildness that provides the energy for new life, connections, images and moral imagination by which to change things in a deep, not superficial, way. The true warrior is a co-creator, a worker with Spirit, a worker for Spirit. The warrior’s hands are the hands of Spirit at work; the warrior’s mind is seized by Spirit precisely in the work of creativity. As 13th century Catholic philosopher and theologian St. Thomas Aquinas put it, “The same Spirit that hovered over the waters at the beginning of creation hovers over the mind of the artist at work.” Every warrior is an artist at work for the people that they might live.
   
   
4. The Via Transformativa. Claims to artistry and to creativity and to co-creation need to be tested. The Spirit requires discernment and evaluation. The primary test for claims of spirit work is that of justice and compassion. Does the work I’m doing pass the justice test? Does it fill gaps between haves and have-nots or make the chasm deeper? Does it contribute to healing and empowerment of the powerless or re-establish the privileges of the few at the expense of the many?

The prophets always speak on behalf of justice; they’re attuned to injustice, which they feel like a kick in the gut. Injustice arouses the passion of anger and the prophet/warrior is in touch with his or her anger and passions. But instead of just responding in a reptilian brain action-reaction mode, the prophet uses the anger as fuel to fire effective and creative ways to enact justice and healing. And the authentic warrior remains humble, or close to the Earth (humus, from which “humility” is derived, means “Earth” in Latin), and aware that he or she is only an instrument of the work of Spirit. Not a messiah. A prophet is a weak and needy human being like everyone else, fully capable of evil and mistakes. And needy also for the Via Positiva to be a regular part of one’s spiritual practise, a need for filling up and refreshing in the cool waters of peace and joy that life’s small moments can bring. Nevertheless, in all of this the warrior/prophet remains fierce for justice and compassion to happen.

We can see that the warrior not only undergoes these four stages in ever-deepening ways but becomes them. Look and see. Look at the warrior in yourself as you practise these ways and become them.

Often, to be a warrior, we must let go of our privileged status in life, no matter how hard won. Putting aside the cloaks of accomplishment, one goes into darkness alone and vulnerable. Nothing guarantees that at the other end one will emerge as the same person or fit to play the same roles in society ever again. Friends and relationships, achievements and titles, salaries and retirement plans may all be left aside.

The warrior knows about death, doesn’t deny mortality but carries it like a shield, a guard by which to defend self and others. Knowing our mortality urges us to live fully and defend what’s beautiful now, not tomorrow. The warrior doesn’t wait to live, doesn’t put off living and loving and defending and creating for another day.

Having learned to let go, the warrior doesn’t harbour resentments or become motivated by revenge to chase after others. Forgiveness, another word for letting go, is learned drip by drip, day by day, not as an act of altruism but as a necessary cleansing of the past, so we can live and function effectively in the now. The soul doesn’t grow into its potential fullness when it harbours past hurt and turns it over and over. That’s the way to grow bitterness, not soul. The warrior is committed to growing the heart and soul, not to freezing it in the puny size it was yesterday or in years past.

The warrior also becomes the artist and creative being, expressing the creativity and aesthetic bias for beauty that the universe demands in all of its actions. The warrior bears ongoing evolution on his or her back, becoming an instrument for evolution, an agent for change and transformation, for the creativity and healing that bring about that evolution. Evolution isn’t accomplished at the expense of the past but brings the past along, folds it into the new forms, the struggling new seeds of plants or beings, ideas or movements, structures or languages that are yearning to be born.

The warrior serves. This service isn’t coerced, as with a slave, but offered. Service is love of strangers. The warrior finds ways to love the stranger. The warrior gives and gives generously. And he gives to himself as well as to the greater community the gifts of love of life (Via Positiva), of stillness and letting go (Via Negativa), of creativity (Via Creativa) and of justice and compassion (Via Transformativa).

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